This past week while in church our pastor gave a sermon about guilt. These are my thoughts:
Many people think that guilt is a natural experience. It's a familiar experience, but it's not healthy or productive. It serves no constructive purpose. Here are five things to think about the next time you are feeling this way:
Guilt comes from a frightened part of your personality.
The actions that you regret also came from a frightened part of
your personality. Following fear with fear moves you in the opposite
direction that your spiritual development requires, which is toward
love.
Guilt impairs your ability to learn from your experiences.
When you see something that you could have done differently, or
wish you had done differently, remember how you could have spoken or
acted in love instead of fear. This helps you apply what you have
learned and keeps you from feeling more guilty. Your experiences are
designed to inform, support, and benefit you, not cause you to contract
into fear and remorse.
Guilt keeps you from being honest with others and yourself.
It keeps you from seeing that you cannot cause another person
emotional pain. You can trigger emotional pain in others, but their pain
comes from inside them, not from you. Their pain is an opportunity for
them to learn about themselves. Your pain is an opportunity for you to
learn about yourself. Guilt distracts you from that crucial lesson.
The relationship between guilt and forgiveness may surprise you.
Guilt is actually a twisted or manipulative way of seeking
forgiveness. It is the belief that if you inflict suffering on yourself
for your choices, another will forgive you for them. This is belief
keeps you in pain because only you can forgive yourself.
You cannot give the gifts that your soul wants you to give while you are feeling guilty.
Your gifts may be to raise a family, create a new kind of
business, write a book, or dance. When you choose not to forgive
yourself, you choose not to give the gifts your soul wants to give. You
can choose otherwise. You—like everyone—have gifts and you were born to
give them.
